Today I have a personal anecdote to share with y'all. Since the end of 2016, after several failed relationships and situationships, I committed to enjoying the company of no one but myself. My intent was not to excommunicate myself from the rest of the world and collect cats to enforce my point, but I did want to let go of unecessary friendships, men that served no purpose, and refrain from going out to the club scene (save for special events). It was these things that I had become attached to and associated happiness and pleasure with; being alone actually scared the hell out of me.
So after I began trudging through the solitude, venturing from one lost thought to another, rekindling old flames with forgotten goals, I felt complete. So complete that my obsessive personality, or addictive nature, or both, enabled me to bask in the loneliness, and unknowingly excommunicate myself more than I had expected (just without the cats). My phone was dry, I wasn't going to clubs at all, not even for special events, I even stopped going to Church because the crowd was too much (I did mention I was obsessive right?). It wasn't until I went to my first networking event of 2017, did I realize what I had done. There I was, the usually loud, outgoing, first to be seen and heard girl, cowered in the corner to protect my solitude. In that moment, I calculated how much gas I had spent to get there, how much time I sacrificed, and how beat my face was, and decided to get out of the corner and be normal. From that one time, I was able to mend a broken friendship (another story for another day), catch the eye of a potential BF, land a job opportunity, and build upon a previously dormant network of other writers, entrepeneurs and business owners.
What TF is the point? If ever you reach a point where you depend on everything but yourself for comfort and happiness, reacquaint yourself with the beauty of being alone, until YOU indpendently become the reason for your happiness. Don't however, concoct some ridiculous cat lady theory like I did, and become so secluded you miss out on opportunities, friendships and the necessary times to be care-free. Balance is key. Now, on to the tea!!
After this week, I'll be including direct quotes from mogul women answering the question: If you could give another woman advice, based on where you are both personally and currently, what would that be?
After all the mayhem surrounding the Met Gala, I became curious of what I had to do to be invited to such a grandeur, socialite gathering. I researched and you may be unsurprised to hear, it's a lot more difficult than simply buying a ticket. Here are the ten most likely, although unfeasible ways to gain entrance to the Met Gala, alongside Rihanna and her toes. (**inside joke, which if you don't understand, means you didn't read yesterday's post. Catch up here**)
1) Donate a shit ton of money- DUH
2) Be Rihanna famous - DUH again
3) Be Rihanna - Last DUH
4) Be Rihanna's train carrier
5) Work at Vogue - Anna Wintour Editor-in-Cheif of Vogue is in charge of the invitation list. Some, and by some I mean no more than five of her staff are supposedly invited.
6) Be Anna Wintour - Aim for the stars kiddos
7) Be Anna Wintour's Son or Daughter - if you pull this off, I love you.
8) Be a Celebrity's Publicist
9) Become a Waiter - Hank Tomashevski is the celebrity chef in charge of staffing. Good luck.
10) Perform at the Gala
If you pull any of these off, it's only right I be your plus one which according to THIS article is gonna cost me up to $50,000. I'll start saving now.
In other fashion and beauty news:
If you haven't heard of Insta Pods yet, and you are a social media influencer or have a brand you want to promote, YOU ARE MISSING OUT. They're online social networking groups that improves organic engagement and exposure. Read more here.
Aries: Having lots of charm is nothing new for you, especially today. You're bubbling over with it. All of this magnetism is flowing back to you and helping you keep a positive attitude -- that's why you're not sweating the small stuff. Flaky or annoying people can't get you down either. You'll just give them a smile and keep going on your merry way. It's also a great day for negotiations.
Taurus: Cutting back on your shopping list of 'must haves' is never a fun thing to do. Depriving yourself of the things you really want feels uncomfortable, but you do need to restrict yourself. The more indulgent you are, the more you will regret it later. A life-changing opportunity is coming soon, but you will need some cash to get in on it. You don't want to miss out on this big chance, so start saving!
Gemini: In a troubled relationship, your smallest efforts can help you both overcome whatever big obstacles are standing in your way. It all starts with honesty -- say what you really feel and don't be afraid to get vulnerable with this person. Whether you're confessing something to a coworker, baring your heart to a partner, or confiding a deep dark secret to a sibling, you can't hold anything back. If you are going to trust them, you have to trust them all the way.
Cancer: You've been telling everyone about the new projects you want to start, and everyone has been wonderfully supportive. But today, they might start to get impatient. It's time to get going and put your energy into fulfilling your promises. It's a great day to initiate things anyway, so take advantage of it -- put things in motion! If you don't do it today, you run the very real risk of getting a reputation for being flaky.
Leo: The people you encounter today are going to love loving you. Everyone who thinks you're cool is ready and raring to let you know it. Accept compliments graciously, because you'll get lots of them. But try not to let it go to your head. Vanity is certainly nothing to be ashamed of, but it's something to indulge in with careful consideration.
Virgo: The people you encounter today are going to love loving you. Everyone who thinks you're cool is ready and raring to let you know it. Accept compliments graciously, because you'll get lots of them. But try not to let it go to your head. Vanity is certainly nothing to be ashamed of, but it's something to indulge in with careful consideration.
Libra: A social opportunity today will offer just what you've been looking for -- new connections! And you will find all these new faces in one place. Play it cool and don't let them know you are counting on them to add some excitement to your life, because they are counting on you to add more excitement to theirs! You'll both win in this situation.
Scorpio: The relationship you've been building with one of your newest friends is getting so intense you're starting to look Siamese twins joined at the hip! Before you lose all sense of your own identity, step away from them for a while. You need to maintain a modicum of your own individuality, so just slow things down. Why not cut back your socializing to once a week?
Sagittarius: This is a day for bargaining, so be prepared to give up something. Are you still trying to persuade someone to agree with you? You cannot oblige people to go along with your demands unless -- of course -- you are willing to return the favor. Need a loan? Work out an interest payment. Need someone's time? Cook them dinner -- maybe a romantic one! Being in debt doesn't have to be unpleasant.
Capricorn: Instead of being annoyed by the day's eccentric energy, it will inspire you. Not knowing exactly what's going to happen next will spark your creativity and help you start up a few new social endeavors. It might be time to join that club, check out that hot nightspot, or explore a new neighborhood. You have the right attitude and energy to discover something new.
Aquarius: At an upcoming family event, you should spend less time with the new relatives and more time with the old relatives. You'll find great value in relationships like these, if only because you can appreciate your roots right now. Enjoy the instant understanding and unconditional love that comes from someone who has known you all your life. It's something you should savor together.
Pisces: Your growing feelings for someone are helping you overlook their imperfections, which is good -- no one is perfect, and it's totally appropriate to focus on their good points. But be careful not to cross over that fine line into illusion. They are who they are, and while you care about them, you can't ignore that fact. You just have to understand that not everyone sees this person the way you do -- and that's okay.
WHO TO FOLLOW
As I've gotten older I've realized that there are too many times we don't give ourselves enough credit for personal growth. You go through storms and the beautiful thing is that you will make it out! You'll change, for the better and elevate into the person you are being shaped to be. ✨Celebrate that!! I thank God everyday for a chance to start fresh, because Lord knows I'm not perfect. But I strive to improve everyday in competition with who I was yesterday. You gotta give yourself a pat on the back for remaining calm during times you would have lashed out, or staying positive with the little things that used to turn your world upside down if it went wrong. Celebrate the small things and watch your perspective change. Thank you to everyone for the kind words and happy birthday wishes!💗💗 Cheers to changing for the better! 🥂🍾🍾🍾🎂 📸 @ashley.champ
QUESTION OF THE DAY
A farmer has five haystacks in one field and four haystacks in another. How many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in one field?
(Answer from yesterday: Meat, he's a butcher.)